Coming Out from the Darkness of Denial

Coming Out from the Darkness of Denial

I no longer apologize for being gay.  It took a while, but I have emerged from the darkness and oppression of denial.  Mine is a highly personal and unique story.  It is also painful to tell because it does not paint a flattering portrait of me or of the church. I’ve...
Coming Out from the Darkness of Denial

Same Reason….Different Outcomes

I actually haven’t made a lot of major decisions in my life.  Most of them were fairly common, auxiliary to the big ones.  And my big decisions have been primarily focused on money, jobs and education…in order to find a career and make a living.  A couple of...
Coming Out from the Darkness of Denial

Defending the Castle

Our lives are like castles that we like to protect.  Two tools I’ve found useful are vigilance and judgment.  Vigilance is devoted attentiveness or watchfulness.  Judgment in this case is the formation of an opinion after consideration or deliberation and the capacity...
Coming Out from the Darkness of Denial

Wanting, Asking and Taking

Have you ever asked someone for what you wanted and didn’t get it?   I have, on multiple occasions and for various ideas, and have gotten nowhere.  I usually made excuses such as “so-and-so is better connected politically”, or “my request was badly timed.” One of the...
Coming Out from the Darkness of Denial

Emotional Hangovers

I often wake up at 4:30 AM in the midst of a very demanding and intense dream.  The dream is usually one of conflict, argument, or internal problem-solving.  Sometimes I can fall back to sleep after a bathroom visit (I wonder what the correlation is between dreaming...