The other day I went up to my friend Mark’s home. He and his roommate rent the second and attic floors of a nice early 20th century home in Boston. He’d let things go for a while and asked me to help him reorganize his space. It was not terribly difficult because he had an idea of what he wanted, where, and how he wanted his space to function. In the end, we got his closet and room clutter under control and organized space for various uses. We even found room for additional storage with space to spare!
One of my foundational goals is always to have space to spare, both externally and internally. Periodically I go through my little home and get rid of stuff I’m not using so that I always have a couple of empty drawers, breathing room in my closet, and simplified storage in the basement. Like Mark I know what I want, where I want it, and how I want my space to function.
The same is true of my internal world. I alone know how I best function. I am aware of how much pressure and stress is too much and the fact I need to eat so that my doggone hypoglycemia (which kicks in like clockwork at 11:30 am and 5:30 pm every day) will not be an issue.
One (of several) matters I lag behind on is realizing more immediately how I am being affected emotionally by others. When something happens out of left-field, my go-to emotions tend to be hurt leading to anger. These are two of my internal saboteurs that prevent me from being fully conscious and therefore taking appropriate action to protect myself and address the issue effectively. They greedily grab up a lot of my extra space.
Another area needing internal space has to do with my work style. For example, I am definitely not meant to spend hours commuting to work every week. Computers are useful tools, not an appendage to which I am chained. The best boss to work for is me.
The extra mental and emotional space I create is very useful. Aside from keeping me in better balance, it affords me time and inspiration for painting, cooking, posting in my blog, and being the best life coach and friend I can be. I thus have a greater capacity to listen to others deeply, to perceive their real needs, and to respond to them authentically.
Oops, got to go now. It’s 11 am and my stomach is telling me to defrost some of that nice homemade pasta sauce and meatballs I made a couple of months ago for today’s lunch…I think I’ll have whole wheat penne…..
Contact the Man’s Coach at michaelparise@gmail.com . The Man’s Coach offers a free coaching session to whoever contacts him.