informal_homeJobs.  Careers.  Relationships.  Marriages.  Living arrangements.  Addictions.  Hobbies.  Any and all of these key elements of our lives had a beginning and may have to come to an end at some point.  None of them are coterminous with our lives.  In other words, we did not come into the world with them and we will not take them with us when we leave this life.

It can be scary to strip away all of the characteristics that seem to define us.  They are certainly unique ways in which we express our lives.  But if we let them define us we are putting ourselves in a prison.  Without these “things” to shape our lives, we are left with our core identity…who we are and not simply what we do.

The stress in coming to terms with endings and new beginnings is right up there with death of a loved one.  Often we cling to a job or relationship, or even to substance abuse, in order to give our lives some kind of shape.  Routine is always easier to deal with than change.  But then there may come a time when these elements must come to completion.  We discover that we have to let them go in order to discover who we really are in this moment.

The benefit of all this change is that we will actually be more fulfilled and successful human beings.  This means that any new job, career, relationship, marriage, living arrangement, etc. will be a clearer reflection of our true values.  We will actually be happier.  Imagine that.

Contact the Man’s Coach at michael@parisecoaching.com .  The Man’s Coach offers a free coaching session to whoever contacts him.